劉嫻

2020年新高考全國Ⅰ卷（山東卷）讀后續(xù)寫給出一篇約350字的記敘文，主要講述在經(jīng)濟(jì)蕭條背景下，人們生活困難但卻互相幫助共克時(shí)艱的故事。文中的母親Mrs. Meredith是一個(gè)善良樂于助人的人，經(jīng)常幫助有困難的家庭。她的三個(gè)孩子想出用家里的玉米制作爆米花，給需要幫助的家庭的孩子Bernard售賣以獲取收入。

讀后續(xù)寫兩個(gè)文段中，寫作的完成程度依賴于閱讀的質(zhì)量和效果。因此，在閱讀已知短文中，我們要回答好“讀什么”“怎么讀”的問題。為解決“讀”的問題，我們需要關(guān)注短文的關(guān)鍵信息，為續(xù)寫做好準(zhǔn)備。

一、運(yùn)用“以讀促寫”策略，抓住有效信息

1. 提煉主要情節(jié)，預(yù)設(shè)故事發(fā)展。

在閱讀已知短文時(shí)，可根據(jù)故事的“起因→發(fā)展→高潮→結(jié)局”的基本模式迅速找到相關(guān)信息，合理推斷故事的高潮和結(jié)局。在這個(gè)過程中，做到故事的合理化情節(jié)預(yù)設(shè)，站在故事的主題高位去預(yù)設(shè)，比如對人物的性格的描述中，出現(xiàn)“most kind and thoughtful， eager to help ”等詞匯，故情節(jié)發(fā)展應(yīng)該圍繞如何去幫助人，不可天馬行空，任意創(chuàng)作。

2. 讀懂續(xù)寫首句，調(diào)整故事走向。

續(xù)寫第一段所給首句“When Mrs. Meredith heard of Johns idea， she thought it was a good one， too.”這一句是故事繼續(xù)發(fā)展的關(guān)鍵點(diǎn)，可從Mrs. Meredith同意約翰的主意后，孩子們是如何做的擴(kuò)展開去，可以寫孩子們是如何分工的，他們都做了什么，Mrs. Meredith幫他們做了什么，無論從什么角度拓展，其結(jié)尾都要注意與續(xù)寫第二段首句呼應(yīng)。根據(jù)第二段所給首句“With everything ready， Bernard started out on his new business.”可以推斷第一段的情節(jié)是Bernard 參與了爆米花制作，并且大家分工合作準(zhǔn)備好了一切所需要的工作。此外，這一句與前文Bernard can take it around to the houses and sell it. 呼應(yīng)，可以從Bernard賣出爆米花的過程及感受，以及Mrs. Meredith的孩子們幫助Bernard后的感受去拓展。

3. 關(guān)注語言風(fēng)格，豐富故事表達(dá)。

續(xù)寫文段的語言風(fēng)格要注意和原文保持一致?？v觀原文語言，語言樸實(shí)但表達(dá)豐富，大致有幾個(gè)特點(diǎn)：

（1）直接引語的使用以及“說”的表達(dá)。如“I wish we could help him to earn money.”said Clara... he sprang to his feet and cried， “I have a great idea！...”采用不同的“說”的表達(dá)，表現(xiàn)說話者不同的情緒情感。cried一詞，激動興奮之情，躍然紙上。

（2）特殊句式的使用。如倒裝句“There was a man sick in bed， his wife， who took care of him and could not go out to work， and their little boy.”“So do I.”

（3）虛擬語氣的使用?！癐 wish you could see him，”she said to her own children.“I wish we could help him to earn money.”said Clara.

（4）現(xiàn)在分詞作伴隨狀語。如“After their mother left the room， the children sat thinking about Bernard.”

（5）三大從句的運(yùn)用。

As the economy was in decline， some people in the town had lost their jobs.（狀語從句）

There was a man sick in bed， his wife， who took care of him and could not go out to work， and their little boy.（定語從句）

（6）并列句的使用。如“For some moments， John said nothing， but， suddenly， he sprang to his feet and cried，“I have a great idea！...”

二、協(xié)同原文，提升“以寫促學(xué)”能力

在續(xù)寫文段時(shí)，要和原文做到高度的協(xié)同性，使前后情節(jié)連貫，語言風(fēng)格一致，渾然一體。下面是筆者的一篇下水作文：

When Mrs. Meredith heard of Johns idea， she thought it was a good one， too.“Its so smart and thoughtful of you to work out such a brilliant plan！”Mrs. Meredith exclaimed with joy. After a careful discussion， they got down to work in high spirits. By the time the mother sent for Bernard， the kids had accomplished the preparation work， grabbing a pack of corns and paper bags as well as borrowing a popcorn machine from a generous neighbour. Shortly， there rushed Bernard in， eyes sparkling with gratitude. Then the excited kids began to put the corns into the machine， added some ingredients and waited. Minutes later， with a sweet smell of popcorn floating around， everyone smiled. When John finally opened to see the golden and tasty“fruits”， they jumped to hug each other for their joint effort.

With everything ready， Bernard started out on his new business. The next morning， he visited his neighbours from door to door to sell his home-made popcorn. Much to his delight， they were quickly sold out. Better still， so delicious was the popcorn that it gained great popularity among people in the community， which gave the boy a precious chance to support his family. No amount of joy could compare to the look in the boys eyes when he handed over an appreciation card to the Merediths， which read：Kindness is like the sunshine. It is your love and kindness that shed light on our life. Without it， I would not have exprienced the brightness and warmth of the world. Thank you！

范文做到了情節(jié)上下連貫、前后呼應(yīng)、語言潤色、與原文協(xié)同一致，較好地使用了原文的語言形式和風(fēng)格。通過運(yùn)用“以讀促寫”策略，完成續(xù)寫，可以培養(yǎng)學(xué)生對故事情節(jié)的推理，人物性格的判斷，預(yù)設(shè)想象等邏輯思維能力。在故事結(jié)尾，主題升華，凸顯主題意義，“愛和善良可以改變世界”，樹立正確的價(jià)值觀念。

責(zé)任編輯 蔣小青