My name is Shen Yifan. I’m in No. 4 Middle School. I love my school verymuch, because our school life is color淤. There are many clubs in the school, suchas drawing club, singing club, dancing club, piano club, English club, readingclub and many kinds of sport于club. We can choose the clubs which we areinterested盂. I joined the English club last year, because I like English so much. Iusually go to the club on Monday and Friday in our school library. I really learna lot of榆from the English club. Now I am good at English very much and I canspeak English fluently.
This is my school life and I enjoy it very much.
河北省阜城縣第四中學(xué) 沈一凡
點(diǎn)評(píng):
優(yōu)點(diǎn):
本文是一篇記敘文。小作者挑了校園生活中的社團(tuán)活動(dòng)進(jìn)行具體描寫。全文詳略得當(dāng)、思路清晰、內(nèi)容充實(shí),是一篇合格的學(xué)生習(xí)作。
需要修改的地方:
①color 改為colorful。be 動(dòng)詞后的表語(yǔ)用形容詞。
②sport 改為sports。名詞sport 用作定語(yǔ)時(shí)通常使用復(fù)數(shù)形式。
③interested 后面加in。be interested in 是固定短語(yǔ),意為“對(duì)……感興趣”。
④去掉of。a lot 在此用作及物動(dòng)詞learn 的賓語(yǔ)。
評(píng)分:
按中考英語(yǔ)作文滿分20 分的評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn),本文修改前可得17 分。