王慧琴
從主題語境的分類來看,體育運動主題既屬于人與自我,又屬于人與社會的范疇。體育運動涉及體育活動、體育與健康、體育精神及體育賽事等話題,在讀后續(xù)寫中體育精神和體育賽事話題較為常見。體育精神和體育賽事類文章主要講如何面對失敗做自我反思,進而克服困難,最終實現(xiàn)夢想;或在同伴的協(xié)助下取得團隊勝利,或在同伴及家人的鼓勵下取得比賽成功的故事,體現(xiàn)了堅持不懈、團結(jié)合作、友誼至上的體育精神。
本次讀后續(xù)寫體育運動類專題將以《因愛而跑》里面的主角基普桑和崔這對熱愛跑步的好朋友參加跑步比賽為例,闡述體育運動賽事類的三部曲:比賽前的場景,比賽過程中的拼搏與堅持,比賽后的感悟和收獲。
主題微語境
《因愛而跑》講述了主人公基普桑和他的好友崔對跑步懷著滿腔熱血,渴望一起“跑”出去,在家人和鄉(xiāng)親們的鼓勵下,克服重重困難,最終實現(xiàn)了夢想的故事。這個故事體現(xiàn)了堅持不懈、團結(jié)合作的體育精神。
一、比賽前的場景
比賽前的場景描寫包括對體育館環(huán)境和場面的描寫,其中重點突出觀眾的熱情、參賽選手的緊張等方面的描寫。
1. Spectators thronged the noisy stadium. Loudspeakers boomed and crackled asthey announced the events. There were so many competitors that several heats had been?arranged for each event. Kipsang felt nervous and his stomach seemed to be tied in knots.He began to fret that he wouldnt be able to run. 觀眾們聚集在嘈雜的體育場。當(dāng)宣布比賽事宜時,擴音器里傳來轟轟聲和噼啪聲。因為參賽者眾多,每項比賽都安排了幾場預(yù)賽?;丈:芫o張,他的胃好像揪成了一團。他開始擔(dān)心自己不能跑了。(比賽前的環(huán)境描寫和緊張的心理描寫)
2. The bright modern stadium was packed with thousands of people, and bandsplayed lively tunes as the teams waited to enter the arena. 明亮的現(xiàn)代體育場里擠進了幾千人,當(dāng)隊員們候場時,樂隊演奏著歡快的音樂。(比賽前的環(huán)境描寫)
3. All around the stadium, everyone was excited as they enjoyed the moment, proud tobe there and full of hope and good spirits. 整個體育場內(nèi),每個人都興奮不已。他們享受此時此刻,對自己能參加奧運會而倍感驕傲,他們滿懷希望、斗志昂揚。(比賽前的環(huán)境描寫、表現(xiàn)運動員自豪的心理描寫和動作描寫)
4. With their hearts thumping, they noticed a lit?up area with people sitting around ingroups. 他們注意到一塊燈火通明的地方,人們?nèi)宄扇旱刈谝黄?,他們的心怦怦跳了起來。(本句先寫心理,后寫視覺,表現(xiàn)了緊張忐忑的心情)
5. He qualified! His big day arrived at last. Kipsang stood nervously at the startingline. Would he perform well? How could he beat all these world?class runners? He felt butterfliesfluttering around inside him. 他進決賽了!這個重要的日子終于來了?;丈>o張地站在起跑線上。他能跑好嗎?他怎么才能打敗其他所有這些世界級跑步運動員呢?他感覺心里七上八下的。(比賽前既期待又緊張的復(fù)雜情緒的心理描寫)
6. All these questions were distracting him. Sternly he told himself to breathe deeply,relax and concentrate. He imagined he was back at home and on his way to school,running fleet?footed like a gazelle. The loudspeakers boomed, announcing each competitors name in turn. The crowd roared. The athletes took up their starting positions. Kipsangs heart skipped. 這些問題正在分散他的注意力。但是他嚴(yán)厲地告訴自己,要深呼吸,要放松,要集中精力。他想象自己回到家鄉(xiāng),在上學(xué)的路上,像一只羚羊一樣敏捷快速地跑著。擴音器響了起來,依次介紹每名參賽選手的名字。觀眾們歡呼起來。選手們準(zhǔn)備好起跑姿勢?;丈5男亩家鰜砹恕#ū荣惽暗男睦砻鑼懞铜h(huán)境描寫)
二、比賽過程中的拼搏與堅持
比賽過程的描寫主要包括表現(xiàn)參賽選手頑強拼搏、堅持不懈的動作描寫、心理描寫以及觀眾反應(yīng)的描寫等。
1. The starting gun fired and the boys bolted down the track. Surprised at how quicklyeveryone was running, Kipsang had to make a determined effort to stretch out and staynear the front. 起跑的槍聲響起,男孩們在跑道上飛奔起來。基普桑很驚訝,大家竟然都跑得那么快,他只能拼盡全力邁開步向前跑,并保持在前列。(比賽過程中堅持拼搏的動作描寫和心理描寫)
2. Every time someone tried to pass him, he just ran harder, faster. As the runnersrounded the last corner, they all put on another burst of speed. Kipsang went faster still.He felt as though his lungs would burst and his legs would give way beneath him. 每次有人想要超過他,他就跑得更努力、更快些。當(dāng)選手們跑過最后一個彎道時,他們都開始加速沖刺?;丈_€是比他們跑得更快。他覺得他的肺好像快要爆炸,雙腿也開始發(fā)軟。(比賽過程中與對手頑強拼搏的動作描寫和心理描寫)
3. Kipsang could feel the other runners in the pack close on his heels, but he was determinednot to let anyone pass. Suddenly, someone behind him clipped his heels. Kipsangstumbled. He lurched forward, staggered, but quickly adjusted his stride tokeep his balance. Runners tried to overtake him. He quickened his pace and ran steadily?onwards, feeling his heart pounding as he strode forward. 基普桑能感覺到隊伍里其他選手們正緊跟在他的身后,但是他下決心絕不能讓他們超過去。突然,后面有人撞了一下他的腳踝,基普桑的身體向前打了個趔趄,步伐也不穩(wěn)了,但是他迅速調(diào)整步伐以保持平衡。選手們一直想要超過他。他加快了步伐,繼續(xù)穩(wěn)步向前,當(dāng)他大步地向前跑時,他感到自己的心怦怦直跳。(比賽過程中遇到困難,繼續(xù)堅持的動作描寫)
4. Quickly Kipsang responded, accelerated, and again stepped up his pace, stridingout ahead of the pack, faster and faster. He felt the wind in his face and heard the roarof the crowd. 基普桑迅速做出回應(yīng),他加速并加大了步伐,在隊伍前面大步跑著,越跑越快。他感覺到風(fēng)吹在他的臉上,聽到人群的歡呼聲。(比賽過程中與對手頑強拼搏的一系列的動作描寫以及觀眾的反應(yīng))
5. The finish line was not far away now. Could he hang on? His legs started to acheand his chest tightened. He could hardly breathe. 現(xiàn)在,終點線已經(jīng)不遠(yuǎn)了。他能堅持到最后嗎?他的雙腿開始疼痛,他的胸腔發(fā)緊。他簡直快不能呼吸了。(比賽過程中遇到困難的心理描寫和動作描寫)
6. Kipsangs thighs screamed in agony as he gasped for breath. If only he could holdon. Somebody close behind tried to pass him. Kipsang tried with all his might. He had tostay in front. He dug deep and forced his legs further, harder faster. One final effort. Helunged forward over the line, together with the other athlete. 基普桑大口喘息著,他的大腿像在痛苦地尖叫。他要是能堅持下去就好了。緊隨其后的人想要超過他?;丈F幢M了全力。他必須保持在前面。他拼盡全力,迫使雙腿繼續(xù)向前跑,跑得更努力也更快。最后一搏。他和另一名運動員一起沖破終點線。(比賽過程中克服困難,堅持拼搏的動作描寫)
三、比賽后的感悟和收獲
1. But he kept pushing, harder and harder, until at last he crossed the line just aheadof the others. He was overjoyed. He had done it! His heart and his head were pounding,but he had won his first race and he was in the final. 但是他繼續(xù)向前跑,跑得越來越用力,直到最后他在其他人之前率先沖過了終點線。他欣喜若狂。他做到了!他的心和腦袋都在咚咚地響,但是他贏得了他的第一場比賽,并且進入決賽了。(比賽后激動的心理描寫)
2. Kipsang tried to catch his breath. His legs wobbled weakly. Anxiously he waitedfor the result. Other runners shook his hand or patted him on the shoulder, but he wasntsure if he could manage to hold on. 基普桑努力地喘息。他的雙腿虛弱地顫抖著。他焦急地等待比賽結(jié)果。其他選手們跟他握手,或是拍拍他的肩膀,但是他不知道自己能不能堅持住。(動作描寫和心理描寫,增加了比賽后等待結(jié)果的緊張感)
3. Kipsang had won the race. He had won a gold medal! His heart almost burst withjoy. 基普桑贏得了比賽。他贏得了一塊金牌!他心中充滿了喜悅。(比賽后獲得金牌時欣喜若狂的心理描寫)
4. What a wonderful feeling! How great it was to be there! Kipsangs dream hadcome true. He was doing what he loved to do. He had done his best and had won a goldmedal. 這種感覺多么奇妙啊!能出現(xiàn)在那里真是太棒了!基普桑的夢想實現(xiàn)了。他做著自己熱愛的事情。他拼盡了全力,贏得了一塊金牌。(比賽后獲得金牌的喜悅心情)
5. Kipsangs heart sang with happiness and his thoughts flew back to his home, hisfamily, and his little village so far away. How proud they would be. Kipsang remembered?how the people of his village had given him the chance to race and had helped him to getstarted. Now he would be able to take his gold medal back home to show it to them. The musiccame to an end, and the winners held up their medals and waved to the cheeringcrowd. 基普桑內(nèi)心喜悅地歌唱著,他的思緒飛回到家中,想起他的家人和那個遙遠(yuǎn)的小村莊。他們該多么驕傲啊。基普桑記得他家鄉(xiāng)的人們給了他比賽的機會,并且?guī)椭~出了第一步?,F(xiàn)在他能把他的金牌帶回家鄉(xiāng)給他們看了。音樂結(jié)束了,獲獎運動員們高舉獎牌,向喝彩的觀眾們揮手。(比賽后的感悟)
句式微練習(xí)
一、比喻句
構(gòu)建續(xù)寫情節(jié)時,運用比喻,使描述更生動形象,增強感染力,如:
He imagined he was back at home and on his way to school, running fleet?footed like agazelle. 他想象自己回到家鄉(xiāng),在上學(xué)的路上,像一只羚羊一樣敏捷快速地跑著。
即學(xué)即練
1. So dynamic was he that he swam more swiftly than ever. With his arms waving, hecut through the water smoothly_______________(像飛魚一樣).
2. They______________(像劍魚一樣猛沖過去), shortening the distancebetween Mike and them.
二、細(xì)化動作描寫
在描寫動作時,要學(xué)會細(xì)化動作,運用并列句,形成動作鏈,增強畫面感。我們可以使用“sb did A, B and/but C”這一句式,如:
He lurched forward, staggered, but quickly adjusted his stride to keep his balance. 他的身體向前打了個趔趄,步伐也不穩(wěn)了,但是他迅速調(diào)整步伐以保持平衡。
即學(xué)即練
1. When she finished, her coach___________(跑過來抱著她).
2. Sally___________(彎腰系鞋帶,聽到)her mother whispering in her ear.
三、sb did sth, doing sth 或doing sth, sb did sth
使用非謂語動詞,可使動作描寫更形象生動,更具有畫面感,如:
Quickly Kipsang responded, accelerated, and again stepped up his pace, striding outahead of the pack, faster and faster. 基普桑迅速做出回應(yīng),他加速并加大了步伐,在隊伍前面大步跑著,越跑越快。
即學(xué)即練
1. ___________(他覺得自己落后了), he realized his heart pounded frantically and his mind went blank.
2. In order to compete for the first place, everyone put all their strength into it,_____________(希望立刻跑到終點獲得第一).
四、副詞的恰當(dāng)使用
副詞在句中作狀語,表達(dá)人物做某個動作的原因、結(jié)果或狀態(tài),或放在句首,或位于句末,增強感染力,使描述更生動形象。常用的高頻副詞有tightly、curiously、eagerly、excitedly、silently、fiercely、firmly、slightly、impatiently、restlessly、cheerfully 等。在體現(xiàn)動作的迅速時,可使用以下修飾語:swiftly、suddenly、immediately、without pausing、without delay、without hesitation等。
His legs wobbled weakly. Anxiously he waited for the result. 他的雙腿虛弱地顫抖著。他焦急地等待比賽結(jié)果。
即學(xué)即練
1. ___________(令人驚訝的是), he found his body lighter and stronger than usual.
2._______________(興奮地), he waved his fist and cheered as loud as he could.
五、with 結(jié)構(gòu)
描述動作或場景時,用with結(jié)構(gòu)作狀語,使描述更生動。
With their hearts thumping, they noticed a lit?up area with people sitting around ingroups. 他們注意到一塊燈火通明的地方,人們?nèi)宄扇旱刈谝黄穑麄兊男拟疋裉似饋怼?/p>
即學(xué)即練
1. I found Cassie run away__________(臉上流著淚).
2. Eventually,_____________(他的心怦怦直跳), he reached the destination.
情境微仿寫
運動會400 米接力賽片段的描寫
情節(jié)構(gòu)思:1.比賽前的場景描寫,同學(xué)們的期待,參賽選手的蓄勢待發(fā);2.比賽開始后,選手們你追我趕,奮力拼搏;3.比賽結(jié)束后的歡呼。
The exciting 400?metre relay finally began. The students surrounded the entire playground,1.__________(瘋狂地歡呼吶喊著). 2.______________(運動員就位后,老師舉起他的手,發(fā)出命令,然后開槍). On hearing the“bang”sound,3._______________-(所有的賽跑者都像離弦的箭一般沖出去). The first athletequickly approached the next person and managed to pass the relay baton into his hand.Once getting the baton, 4.___________ (第二個運動員緊緊抓住接力棒,一眨眼就全速跑了出去,然后把接力棒傳給了第三個運動員). Soon, the last runner setoff in the blink of an eye. I didnt recognize him until he got closer. It was Li Hua—a classmatefrom my class! Suddenly, a great cheer went up from the crowd when he crossed thefinish line and ran towards us with a glowing smile.
語篇微演練
閱讀下列短文,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫文章,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。注意續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。
主題1 鄉(xiāng)村越野賽跑
(2022·新高考Ⅰ卷)It was the day of the big cross?country run. Students from seven?different primary schools in and around the small town were warming up and walking theroute(路線)through thick evergreen forest.
I looked around and finally spotted David, who was standing by himself off to the sideby a fence. He was small for ten years old. His usual big toothy smile was absent today. Iwalked over and asked him why he wasn't with the other children. He hesitated and thensaid he had decided not to run.
What was wrong? He had worked so hard for this event!
I quickly searched the crowd for the schools coach and asked him what had happened.“I was afraid that kids from other schools would laugh at him,”he explained uncomfortably.“I gave him the choice to run or not, and let him decide.”
I bit back my frustration(懊惱). I knew the coach meant well—he thought he was doingthe right thing. After making sure that David could run if he wanted, I turned to findhim coming towards me, his small body rocking from side to side as he swung his feet forward.
David had a brain disease which prevented him from walking or running like otherchildren, but at school his classmates thought of him as a regular kid. He always participatedto the best of his ability in whatever they were doing. That was why none of the childrenthought it unusual that David had decided to join the cross?country team. It just took himlonger—thats all. David had not missed a single practice, and although he always finishedhis run long after the other children, he did always finish. As a special education teacher atthe school, I was familiar with the challenges David faced and was proud of his strong determination.
Paragraph 1:
We sat down next to each other, but David wouldnt look at me.
Paragraph 2:
I watched as David moved up to the starting line with the other runners.
主題2 薩莉的足球賽
The football season was almost over. Sally had been playing football all summer. Shereally enjoyed running around with the other players in her bright orange uniform, chasingthe black and white ball across the grassy field. As much as she tried, though, Sally stillhad not scored one single goal.
Before each game, they had a practice session. The coach showed Sally and her teamhow to pass the ball to each other and take shots at the goal. Sally was pretty good at passingthe ball, but even during practices, she couldnt kick the ball past the goalkeeper. Shewondered if she should quit football and join a different club.
“Don't give up,”said the coach. But it was half?time, and Sally was feeling frustrated.She was trying! Every time she got a chance to kick the ball, it would go in the wrong directionor a player from the other team would take control of it. She sipped at her cola andpouted (噘嘴).
The break was over and the referee blew his whistle to start the game again. The twoteams walked back onto the field, both determined to win. Sally bent, tied up her shoelaceand heard her mother whispering in her ear,“Stay focused. Keep your eyes on the ball.Look for an opportunity to get the ball. You can do it.”
Sally stood up and took a deep breath. Even if she didnt get one goal all summer, sheknew that she had tried her best. That was something to be proud of. So she smiled at hermother and headed to her position. The whistle blew, and the game continued.
The score was tied with one goal each. The green team was pretty good, but Sallys orangeteam was fast. The girls' ponytails bounced as they ran, with many feet kicking frantically(拼命地) at the ball when it came near them. It was a rather boring game and Sallysheart was no longer in it.
Paragraph 1:
Sally started daydreaming about joining other school clubs.
Paragraph 2:
Recalling her mothers words, Sally was woken from her daydream.