唐孝云

一、概述

在高考備考中，讀后續(xù)寫與故事復述兩道題型都是學生的難點。從題型的設置看，讀后續(xù)寫與故事復述有一個巨大的共同點，即文本都以記敘文為主。從考查的目的看，讀后續(xù)寫側重考查學生的閱讀和寫作能力，故事復述則側重考查學生的聽說能力；但是，也有相似之處，讀后續(xù)寫需要學生通過閱讀獲取信息弄懂故事梗概，再根據(jù)段首句關鍵詞進行合理的推斷，組織語言寫出符合邏輯的故事；而故事復述需要學生通過已知信息及故事梗概和關鍵詞，做出合理的推斷，有針對性地聽取更多的信息后，組織語言復述原文故事。由此可見，教師可以將兩道題型的備考結合起來?，F(xiàn)在以兩道高考真題為例，分析如何運用相似的解題方法和步驟幫助學生提高讀后續(xù)寫與故事復述的解題能力。

二、實例分析——讀后續(xù)寫

（2021年全國Ⅰ卷）閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構成一篇完整的短文。

A MOTHERS DAY SURPRISE

The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother's Day. How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed. They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge. They had watched their mother in the kitchen. There was nothing to it. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do．

The big day came at last. The alarm rang at 6 a.m. The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen. They decided to boil the porridge first. They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast. Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk. Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture. Next，Jeff turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan. Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread. The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds. Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread. This time，she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely．

Then Jeff noticed steam shooting out of the pot and the lid starting to shake. The next minute，the porridge boiled over and put out the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully，Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly. But the stove was a mess now. Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge. But Jeff's hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain. Jenna made him put his hand in cold water. Then she caught the smell of burning. Oh dear！ The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右；

2. 請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。

Para.1：As the twins looked around them in disappointment，their father appeared.

Para. 2：The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up.

1. 讀要素

Elements

Whothe twins （Jenna，Jeff），father，mother

Whenon Mother's Day

Wherein the kitchen，upstairs，at home

WhatThe twins planned to cook breakfast for their mother on Mother's Day.

通過讀故事原文的基本要素并進行歸納可以得出故事梗概：在母親節(jié)的當天，雙胞胎Jenna和Jeff在廚房里為媽媽準備早餐作為節(jié)日禮物。剛開始進行得比較順利，但是后來粥溢出來了，Jeff的手燙傷了，面包也烤焦了。正在一籌莫展之時，父親出現(xiàn)了。

2. 推故事

閱讀段首句，找出關鍵詞推斷故事的發(fā)展。續(xù)寫第一段關鍵詞有Twins，disappointment，their father；續(xù)寫第二段關鍵詞有the breakfast，upstairs，woke up，their mother?；谠?，根據(jù)正能量原則以及第二段關鍵詞，可以推斷，續(xù)寫第一段父親出現(xiàn)應該起到的是積極作用，即成功地幫助雙胞胎完成給媽媽做早餐的計劃。續(xù)寫第二段則主要側重描寫媽媽在看到雙胞胎的節(jié)日禮物時的反應。

3. 寫故事

根據(jù)歸納出的故事梗概和段首句中關鍵詞進行合理的推斷后，學生可以以每一段出現(xiàn)的人物為主語造簡單句構建故事情節(jié)。根據(jù)150字的字數(shù)要求，續(xù)寫的每一段大概寫8句左右即可。續(xù)寫如下：

Para.1：As the twins looked around them in disappointment，their father appeared.

① He saw the mess in the kitchen．

② He understood．

③ He comforted the twins.

④ He helped them cook breakfast.

⑤ He taught them to cook porridge，fry bread and clean the kitchen.

⑥ The breakfast was ready.

⑦ The twins were delighted.

⑧ They thanked their father.

Para. 2：The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up.

① The twins said Happy Mother's Day．

② Their mother saw the breakfast．

③ She was surprised．

④ She was moved．

⑤ She said thank you．

⑥ She hugged them．

⑦ Their father also came into the room．

⑧ She suggested they eat all of the food together．

⑨ They enjoyed the breakfast together.

4. 潤故事

為了使故事完整且豐滿，在構建故事情節(jié)時，學生要盡可能地進行細節(jié)描寫，即要考慮到主要人物的動作、心理、語言，必要時添加起到烘托作用的環(huán)境描寫。為了使故事條理清晰邏輯合理，學生需要使用恰當?shù)你暯釉~。為了使故事更具有可讀性，學生在運用語言時，可適當使用從句、非謂語動詞等復雜的語法結構，同時，要注意語言的一致性，即人稱一致、時態(tài)一致等。

A possible version：

Para.1：As the twins looked around them in disappointment，their father appeared. Seeing the mess in the kitchen，their father understood what they were doing（動作描寫）. “Don't be upset. Let me help you，dear.（語言描寫）” He comforted them gently. The twins changed their sorrow into joy （心理描寫）.Then their father taught them to cook porridge，fry bread and clean the kitchen step by step（動作描寫）. Within half an hour，under their father's guidance，the kitchen was cleaned and the breakfast was ready（動作描寫）. The twins were so delighted and thanked their father sincerely（心理及動作描寫）．

Para. 2：The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. “Happy Mother's Day！ Mom！” They said to their mother happily（語言描寫）. At the sight of the breakfast，their mother was surprised and moved（心理描寫）. “Thank you！ Sweetheart！” She replied and hugged them tightly（語言及動作描寫）. At the moment，their father came into the room and looked at them with a satisfied look（動作及心理描寫）. The twins asked their mother to try the breakfast and looked at her expectantly（語言及動作描寫）. She tried it and nodded，“It tastes so good?。▌幼骷罢Z言描寫）” Then she suggested they eat the breakfast together（語言描寫）. They enjoyed the breakfast delightedly（動作描寫）. The house was surrounded by love（環(huán)境描寫）．

三、實例分析——故事復述

（2019年試題A）Part C Retelling

In this part，you are required to listen to a monologue and then retell what you have heard in your own words．

梗概：母親節(jié)，Tom欲購鮮花郵遞給母親，一小女孩的行為使他改變了主意。

關鍵詞： flower（鮮花） deliver（郵遞） girl（女孩） cancel（取消） in person（親自）

1. 推故事

在平時的訓練過程中，學生可按照讀后續(xù)寫的方法，在聽錄音之前根據(jù)故事梗概和關鍵詞，進行合理的推斷，并以主人公做主語造簡單句構建故事情節(jié)。

① Tom wanted to buy some flowers for his mum on Mother's Day．

② Tom wanted to deliver the flowers to his mum．

③ Tom met a little girl．

④ The little girl did something．

⑤ Tom changed his mind．

⑥ Tom canceled his delivery．

⑦ Tom gave the flowers to his mum in person.

2. 聽信息

在記敘文中，主人公的行為動作推動著故事發(fā)展，因此，首先要聽的信息是主人公的動作即錄音中的動詞。然后，根據(jù)故事的要素，考生必須要聽取的信息有who，when，where，what，how，why。在這一道高考題中，學生需聽取的信息包括：除了Tom，girl還有沒有其他的人物；已知when是母親節(jié)，學生則需注意具體的故事發(fā)展先后的具體時間詞；故事發(fā)生的地點where即在哪里買花，在哪里遇到的小女孩等；以及推斷故事中 “The little girl did something”，小女孩到底做了什么即what，也就是Tom是how 和why改變主意的。

最后，根據(jù)讀后續(xù)寫潤故事的方法，為了使故事完整且豐滿，細節(jié)描寫要全面，即要盡可能地聽取有關主人公的心理描寫、語言描寫以及必要的環(huán)境描寫。

3. 作記錄

在推斷出的故事的基礎上，記錄需要特意聽取的信息，記錄時恰當使用常用的速記方法，如下表所示：

4. 說故事

根據(jù)推斷出的故事和記錄的信息，組織語言說出故事。與訓練讀后續(xù)寫“潤故事”一樣，在組織語言時，注意語法結構，保持人稱和時態(tài)一致。為了使故事條理清晰邏輯合理，需要使用恰當?shù)你暯釉~。

Possible version：

On Mother's Day，Tom stopped his car outside a flower shop. He wanted to buy some flowers and deliver them to his mother. Before he entered the shop，he saw a little girl crying on the roadside. He walked to the girl and asked what happened. The little girl told him she wanted to buy a rose for her mom but she didn't have money. After hearing the girl's words，Tom took the girl's hand，entered the shop，ordered flowers for his mum and bought a rose for the girl. Then，Tom wanted to drive the girl home. However，the girl said she wouldn't go home but go to the bus station. Because her mum worked in another town and she wanted to give the rose to her today. Tom was touched and changed his mind. After driving the girl to the station，he returned to the shop，canceled the delivery，bought flowers and a box of chocolates，drove to his mom，and gave them to her in person．

四、結語

總之，在讀后續(xù)寫和故事復述的備考過程中，巧妙地運用故事梗概和關鍵詞，將兩道題型的訓練有效地結合起來，優(yōu)化教學設計，不僅能夠鞏固學生的語法知識、訓練學生的閱讀寫作能力，也能提升學生的聽說能力，更重要的是訓練了學生觸類旁通的邏輯思維能力。

責任編輯吳昊雷