安徽省合肥市巢湖第二中學(xué)九（1）班 唐夢(mèng)妮

When we come to this world,wegetcareand help from manypeople.Parents give birth to us and cultivate us to grow.Friends are always there to help us.Teachers try to guide us to a better life path.And even strangers also give us a lot of warmth.All of this teaches us to learn to be grateful to others.

As the saying goes,“Only a life lived for others is worth it.”So what is important to us is that we have to remember that we should be grateful to others forever.Besides,I think it is especially important that this is reflected in our actions.For parents,the best gift we can give them is to study hard and make progress every day.At home,we should help them share as much housework as possible.In order to express our love for our parents,we should often chat with them about our progress in learning and so on.For teachers,we should be strict with ourselves.We should take the classes and do the homework assigned by teachers seriously.Study hard and try to be a moral person,and a person who will be useful to society in the future.

As we all know,friends are the wealth of life.We should treat our friends sincerely and always be friendly to them.It is important to learn to cherish the friendship between friends.We should help others.Don't forget that helping others is also helping ourselves.So for others,especially for strangers,we should be friendly to them.We should offer to give them a hand when they have difficulties.In a word,we are active in helping others and we are grateful to others,to our society.

Thank the world for bringing us light and warmth,and thank the world for giving us a beautiful nature.Thanks to the society for providing us many opportunities for success,and thanks to our homeland for giving us a peaceful place to live.

Always be grateful,and strive to make the world a better place,a more beautiful homeland.

學(xué)生簡(jiǎn)介:

唐夢(mèng)妮同學(xué)，班長(zhǎng)兼英語(yǔ)課代表，文化課成績(jī)?nèi)珒?yōu)。喜愛(ài)文體活動(dòng)，經(jīng)常主持學(xué)校大型的文藝演出。她積極投入于班級(jí)工作，樂(lè)于幫助同學(xué)，是同學(xué)們的好朋友，老師的好助手。

【習(xí)作點(diǎn)評(píng)】

這是一篇主題為“感恩他人”的學(xué)生習(xí)作。文章首先寫(xiě)了我們?yōu)槭裁匆獙?duì)父母、老師、朋友甚至陌生人心存感激，然后具體介紹了我們應(yīng)該怎樣做才能將感激之情落實(shí)在具體的行動(dòng)上。文章充滿(mǎn)了正能量，給人以人生的教誨與啟迪。

全文結(jié)構(gòu)完整，層次清楚，段落劃分恰當(dāng)。尤其是第一、二段的首句和末尾句的相呼應(yīng)，使得文章結(jié)構(gòu)非常嚴(yán)謹(jǐn)。文中復(fù)雜結(jié)構(gòu)和高級(jí)詞匯的大膽、準(zhǔn)確運(yùn)用，可以看出該學(xué)生課余時(shí)間一定善于閱讀和積累，英語(yǔ)水平相當(dāng)不錯(cuò)。尤其是結(jié)尾兩段清一色的祈使句的使用，讓文章充滿(mǎn)了強(qiáng)烈的感情色彩，震撼人心。諺語(yǔ)、俗話(huà)及一些高級(jí)句式的運(yùn)用，提升了文章的檔次。

盡管此文句式變化不少，但是略感文章中should一詞運(yùn)用過(guò)頻，如果能用其他的句型來(lái)替換一下，或許給人的感覺(jué)會(huì)更為舒服、自然。