雪瑞·孟德森（Cheryl Mendelson），美國(guó)作家，出生于賓夕法尼亞州格林縣農(nóng)家，先后獲得羅切斯特大學(xué)哲學(xué)博士學(xué)位和哈佛大學(xué)法學(xué)院法學(xué)博士學(xué)位。曾在紐約從事律師工作，并在普渡大學(xué)和哥倫比亞大學(xué)巴納德學(xué)院教授哲學(xué)。1999年，她出版了《家事的撫慰：食物、衣物，以及合理的家事計(jì)劃》（Home Comforts： The Art and Science of Keeping House），后出版小說(shuō)三部曲《晨邊高地》（Morningside Heights）、《愛(ài)，工作，孩子》（Love， Work， Children）、《一切為了簡(jiǎn)》（Anything for Jane）。目前雪瑞與丈夫和兒子一起生活。

Excerpts1）

I am a working woman with a secret life： I keep house. An off-and-on2） lawyer and professor in public， in private I launder3） and clean， cook from the hip， and devote serious time and energy to a domestic routine not so different from the one that defined my grandmothers as “housewives.” When I want a good read， I reach for my collection of old housekeeping manuals. The part of me that enjoys housekeeping and the comforts it provides is central to my character.

Until now， I have almost entirely concealed this passion for domesticity. No one meeting me for the first time would suspect that I squander my time knitting or my mental reserves remembering household facts such as the date when the carpets and mattresses were last rotated. Without thinking much about it， I knew I would not want this information about me to get around. After all， I belong to the first generation of women who worked more than they stayed home. We knew that no judge would credit the legal briefs of a housewife， no university would give tenure to one， no corporation would promote one， and no one who mattered would talk to one at a party.

Being perceived as excessively domestic can get you socially ostracized4）. When I made hand-rolled pasta for a dinner， I learned the hard way that some guests will find this annoying， as they do not feel comfortable eating a meal that they regard as the product of too much trouble. When my son was in nursery school， I made the mistake of spending a few hours sewing for him a Halloween astronaut costume of metallic cloth， earning the disgust， suspicion， and hard stares of many a fellow parent who had bought a Batman or Esmeralda costume. When I finally had to begin disclosing to friends and acquaintances just what the long book was about that I had been working on for so many years， I got a lot of those stares. Many times my courage failed me when painful silences followed my confession， “No， not a history of housework， an explanation of it—a practical book on how you make the bed and make a comfortable home，” or “No， nothing about recipes， bouquets， gardening， monogramming， decorating， or crafts. Its about how a home works， not how it looks—what different fabrics are for， pantry and refrigeration storage， laundering and ironing， tuning the piano， cleaning and dusting， household records， books， laws， germs， allergies， and safety.” I managed to persevere partly because not everyone responded with that stare; there was enthusiasm as well. And I was struck that no one responded with bored indifference. The topic was clearly hot—too hot for some people to handle， heartwarming to others.

Born Too Late

For me， too， the subject was actually something of a hot potato. I was raised to be a rural wife and mother， but I was born too late to find many openings for farm wives. Until I was thirteen， I lived in the Appalachian5） southwest corner of Pennsylvania， for most of the time on a working farm where I received an old-fashioned domestic education quite unlike the experience of the average girl in the 1950s. Early on， I learned baby care， housecleaning， laundering， gardening， cooking， embroidering， knitting， and sewing. I slopped the pigs， herded the cows， and helped out with the milking. I was proud to be able to pin a cloth diaper around a baby when I was six， and cook breakfasts of eggs， bacon， toast， and coffee for a large family and the hired help when I was nine.

Because housekeeping skills got respect in my world， I looked forward to keeping a house of my own one day. It was what I wanted， and part of me was confident that I could do it well. Another part doubted practically everything I had been taught. That was because my domestic education was a battlefield in a subtle war between my two grandmothers. These ladies， both expert in needlecraft， cookery， canning， and all the other arts of the home， each held an absolute conviction that there was a right way to keep house （the one she had been brought up with） and a wrong way （all others）.

My maternal grandmother was a fervent housekeeper in her ancestral Italian style， while my paternal grandmother was an equally fervent housekeeper in a style she inherited from England， Scotland， and Ireland. In one home I heard Puccini6）， slept on linen sheets with finely crocheted7） edging rolled up with lavender from the garden， and enjoyed airy， light rooms with flowers sprouting in porcelain pots on windowsills and the foreign scents of garlic and dark， strong coffee. The atmosphere was open and warmly hospitable. The other home felt like a fortress—secure against intruders and fitted with stores and tools for all emergencies. There were Gay Nineties8） tunes on the player piano and English hymns， rooms shaded almost to darkness against real and fancied harmful effects of air and light， hand-braided rag rugs， brightly colored patchwork quilts， and creamed lima beans from the garden.

作品賞析

《家事的撫慰》一書(shū)的英文副標(biāo)題是“The Art and Science of Keeping House”（操持家務(wù)的藝術(shù)與科學(xué)）。作者雪瑞·孟德森在解釋這個(gè)書(shū)名時(shí)寫(xiě)道：“持家是一門(mén)藝術(shù)，頭腦直覺(jué)與身體技能相互配合，才能創(chuàng)造出舒適、健康、美麗、秩序與安全。它也是一門(mén)科學(xué)，是幫助我們更加睿智、高效和人性地實(shí)現(xiàn)上述諸項(xiàng)目標(biāo)的知識(shí)體系。”秉持這樣的創(chuàng)作理念，雪瑞在書(shū)中不僅與讀者分享了操持家務(wù)所必備的常識(shí)，更探問(wèn)了為何我們需要這些居家常識(shí)，用這些常識(shí)構(gòu)建出的家是什么模樣，以及為何這樣的操勞能夠?yàn)槲覀儙?lái)珍貴的撫慰感。

在書(shū)的一開(kāi)始，雪瑞就以“生不逢時(shí)”為題，講述了自己與家務(wù)事的淵源。雖然生長(zhǎng)在賓夕法尼亞州的農(nóng)場(chǎng)，經(jīng)由持家有道的祖母和外祖母的影響，從小對(duì)操持家務(wù)耳濡目染，雪瑞卻感嘆自己生得太晚，已經(jīng)無(wú)法順理成章地過(guò)上嫁為農(nóng)婦、養(yǎng)兒育女的主婦人生。在雪瑞成長(zhǎng)起來(lái)的新世代，居家常識(shí)似乎變得無(wú)關(guān)緊要，于是她轉(zhuǎn)而勤奮讀書(shū)，獲取學(xué)位，走進(jìn)婚姻，步入職場(chǎng)。這些人生經(jīng)歷看似把雪瑞從家庭主婦型的傳統(tǒng)人生模式越拉越遠(yuǎn)，實(shí)際上卻推動(dòng)她對(duì)何以為家和怎樣持家進(jìn)行愈發(fā)深入的思考。雪瑞的第一段婚姻以失敗告終，原因是她和丈夫?qū)覄?wù)事都不聞不問(wèn)，最終導(dǎo)致兩人矛盾重重，夫妻關(guān)系無(wú)法維系。她也曾因工作太忙，把家當(dāng)做旅館，只在其中睡覺(jué)、洗澡、換衣服，覺(jué)得自己活得像顆機(jī)械運(yùn)轉(zhuǎn)的螺絲釘。即便她在第二段婚姻中積累了較豐富的家事心得，日漸享受著家的幸福，但是在社交場(chǎng)合的雪瑞也常常只敢以“律師”和“教授”的面目示人，將“家事達(dá)人”當(dāng)做是自己的秘密人生。雪瑞的這些經(jīng)歷使她對(duì)家和家事的思考有著更為現(xiàn)代的關(guān)照。這些思考是闡釋和討論性的，而不是“菜譜式”和速成型的，它對(duì)回歸家事的立場(chǎng)是溫和且迂回的，因此才獲得了超越職業(yè)甚至無(wú)關(guān)性別的普適性。對(duì)于和雪瑞一樣“生不逢時(shí)”的現(xiàn)代讀者而言，雪瑞的這本家事心得因此更具實(shí)用性和開(kāi)放性。

對(duì)畢業(yè)于哲學(xué)和法學(xué)專業(yè)并曾擔(dān)任律師的雪瑞而言，家是一系列權(quán)利的集合。而家?guī)Ыo人們的舒適感，很大一部分正是源于人們對(duì)于這些權(quán)利的伸張和享用。從這個(gè)意義上來(lái)說(shuō)，我們之所以需要悉心了解持家之道，是因?yàn)椋毫私馐巢牡倪x購(gòu)和烹飪，是在練習(xí)防御和守護(hù)家人的健康;勤力打掃與清洗，是在擊退灰塵、異味、細(xì)菌、霉變、昆蟲(chóng)等不速之客的入侵和騷擾;摸索收納與貯藏，是在繪制能夠戰(zhàn)勝遺忘和惰性的明晰地圖;甚至有人潛心進(jìn)修成業(yè)余的電工和管道工，以管窺上帝創(chuàng)世般的榮耀，在需要有光的時(shí)候，開(kāi)關(guān)一觸即亮，而在需要安眠時(shí)，水龍頭滴水不漏。我們稱之為家的這個(gè)空間之所以舒適而珍貴，并不單單是因?yàn)樗呢S沛或便利，更是因?yàn)檫@是家的操持者依著自己的模樣，仿佛造物主般從無(wú)到有創(chuàng)造出的私人專屬伊甸園。而作為創(chuàng)造過(guò)程的家事操持，往往能夠帶來(lái)貫穿日常、微小卻恒久的滿足感。

雪瑞筆下的家事操勞是撫慰性的，還因?yàn)樗覍?shí)地還原了人生周而復(fù)始、往復(fù)循環(huán)的日常面貌。很多人之所以對(duì)操持家務(wù)抱持著厭煩甚至恐懼的態(tài)度，正是因?yàn)榧覄?wù)的操持似乎無(wú)休無(wú)止，仿佛永遠(yuǎn)沒(méi)有大功告成，可以心滿意足、功成身退的那一刻。我們一遍又一遍地需要睡覺(jué)、飲食、洗澡、換洗、清潔、放松、學(xué)習(xí)和娛樂(lè)，這些需求千頭萬(wàn)緒，此起彼伏。而在雪瑞看來(lái)，我們之所以需要悉心了解持家之道，是要在其中聆聽(tīng)每日的節(jié)拍，感受季節(jié)的更替，把握年歲的脈搏，并依此創(chuàng)造出適合自己的節(jié)奏。而一個(gè)操持有方的家正是以悉心的經(jīng)營(yíng)確立了這樣的節(jié)奏，使它“應(yīng)和著生活的旋律”。因此，在雪瑞看來(lái)，以勤勉的姿態(tài)替換一勞永逸的奢望，恰恰是正確持家的第一步。而通過(guò)這種維護(hù)和操持所換來(lái)的珍貴恒常，才是家的要義所在。在這個(gè)意義上，家的舒適和珍貴并非源自于它的富麗奢華，也不源自它的纖塵不染，而是因?yàn)樗绾粑憔d長(zhǎng)，隨著主人的飲食起居進(jìn)行自身的新陳代謝。而家事的這種細(xì)水長(zhǎng)流的煥新力量，才得以源源不絕地對(duì)抗著人生仿佛“西西弗斯式”的徒勞無(wú)功感。

《家事的撫慰》一書(shū)出版于1999年，雪瑞動(dòng)筆的初衷是因?yàn)樽婺競(jìng)儌飨聛?lái)的家務(wù)秘訣已不適用于隨著時(shí)代變遷而發(fā)生著巨大變化的現(xiàn)代家庭。而當(dāng)我們?cè)诙嗄曛笤賮?lái)閱讀雪瑞的這本居家手冊(cè)，可能也會(huì)不禁感嘆社會(huì)發(fā)展的迅速，其中也有失效落伍的章節(jié)，也有居家討論的盲點(diǎn)。然而雪瑞寫(xiě)作的語(yǔ)境并沒(méi)有太多變化：科技的進(jìn)步帶來(lái)了更多省時(shí)省力的便利，隨之而來(lái)的喧囂吵鬧卻似乎有隔斷人與世界共通脈搏的風(fēng)險(xiǎn)，家之所以為家的諸多特權(quán)也面臨著更多被蠶食和被侵犯的挑戰(zhàn)?；诖?，我們對(duì)于家和家事的探問(wèn)思量，實(shí)在是需要多一點(diǎn)，再多一點(diǎn)。