餐桌上的學(xué)問(wèn)

Fun fact: Sticking your chopsticks vertically in a bowl of rice is taboo, as it resembles incense sticks that the Chinese traditionally burn in honour of deceased loved ones.

How many times have you heard, “No elbows on the table!” or, “Chew with your mouth closed!”Growing up, I heard this every night, so by the time I moved to China in 2003, I was pretty con fi dent in my table mannerisms. That is, until I found my friends staring wide-eyed in shock as I stuck my chopsticks upright in my bowl of rice. Not cool, apparently. I'd just incensed my new (and few) friends. As a gesture of apology (and to serve them), I used my rice-infused chopsticks to turn over the fi sh… and all hell broke loose. Again.

In China, it's easy to make rookie mistakes and little blunders that label you as a newcomer. If you happen to get invited to a formal meal, here are some tried and tested tips to avoid being the centre of (unwanted) attention.

Tap for tea to say thanks. When someone pours tea into your cup, lightly tap the table with your index and middle fi nger

COLUMNIST’S PROFILE

Lena Gidwani is a resident of Guangzhou for 13 years, selfconfessed networker, magazine editor and an avid writer.

Lena Gidwani，網(wǎng)絡(luò)工作者、雜志編輯、作家，在廣州居住13年。

a couple of times. Legend has it that an emperor, in an attempt to hide his identity, poured tea for his servant, who consequently tapped his fi ngers as a show of respect.

An even number of dishes is best. Odd numbers symbolise death. Order in even numbers to ensure a balance of yin and yang, but avoid the number four as it is considered unlucky.

Be considerate. Always serve others before you serve yourself. It's also uncouth to attack the lazy suzy tabletop like you would a Frisbee, or use your chopsticks to burrow through the food and dig for treasures. What you deserve will be served to you, said Confucius.

Let your host or elders eat fi rst. Remember that your elders made it through school without Google or Wikipedia, so the least you can do is allow them to initiate the festivities. And when toasting, use both hands to show respect.

Elegance is key. It's really simple: don't be a slob and don't spit out bones even though you've noticed many doing it. Try everything even though it looks weird and never take the last piece of anything. It's considered bad luck and shows your greed.

If you've realised that the fi rst letter of each of the fi ve tips make up the word TABLE, tap yourself on your back. Well done, and what an easy way to remember your manners!

Now for the best part – the little game of “Who will pay the bill?” This is where you, my dear newbie, will shine if you do as instructed. First, make a beeline for the bill, even though you secretly know that the host will pay for it. Your host will also grab it; he or she can't let you pay as it means that they cannot afford the meal. Secondly, continue to argue; failure to do so insinuates that your host owes you something. Thirdly, with a heavy sigh, graciously thank and accept their hospitality. Enjoy the experience; there will be many more bills coming your way to pay.

“手肘不許放桌上” ，“吃東西要閉上嘴”，我從小聽(tīng)著這些規(guī)矩長(zhǎng)大，所以來(lái)中國(guó)后，我對(duì)餐桌禮儀胸有成竹。直到一天，朋友們被我驚得目瞪口呆——我把筷子直直地插在米飯上。在中國(guó)，這表示我在祭奠他們。為表歉意，我想招呼他們吃魚，就用沾滿飯粒的筷子翻了一下魚……結(jié)果，天又塌了。

初來(lái)中國(guó)的人很容易觸及雷區(qū)。如果被邀參加正式的會(huì)餐，可以參考下列“血淚”經(jīng)驗(yàn)，以免成為焦點(diǎn)。

?叩桌對(duì)倒茶的人表示謝意。有人為你倒茶時(shí)，應(yīng)用食指及中指輕敲幾次桌面。

?菜品數(shù)量以偶數(shù)為佳。為保持陰陽(yáng)平衡，菜品的數(shù)量采用屬陰的偶數(shù)。但切記避開(kāi)4，4不吉利。

?體貼他人。要先照顧他人用餐。飛擲餐具、用筷子翻攪菜都是沒(méi)有教養(yǎng)的行為。

?主人和長(zhǎng)輩優(yōu)先。長(zhǎng)輩們比我們艱苦，要讓他們?cè)谘鐣?huì)上先開(kāi)動(dòng)。祝酒時(shí)要用雙手，以示敬意。

?優(yōu)雅很關(guān)鍵。舉止不粗俗，別夾菜盤里最后一棵菜，會(huì)帶來(lái)壞運(yùn)，也會(huì)顯得你貪心。

買單環(huán)節(jié)最精彩。新人若能按以下建議行事，絕對(duì)出彩。首先，即便知道主人會(huì)買單，也要搶賬單。主人會(huì)搶回去，不然顯得他們沒(méi)錢。接著，繼續(xù)搶，不搶就好像主人本來(lái)虧欠了你。最后，重重嘆口氣，優(yōu)雅地感謝主人的款待。別急，將來(lái)，還有大把賬單等著你買。

LOCAL TABLE NICETIES

Text by Lena Gidwani Photo by CFP Translation by Emma Xu