李雨婕

“I love you” might be one of the most important three-words in the English language. It signs that a romantic relationship is serious, and shows the close relationship of sibling1, parents, or children, it is also a common lyrics2 in pop songs.

“I love you”或許是英語(yǔ)中最重要的三字句之一。它是人們認(rèn)真對(duì)待一段戀情的標(biāo)志，同時(shí)也能表達(dá)兄弟姐妹、父母和孩子間的親密關(guān)系，它也常常出現(xiàn)在流行歌曲的歌詞里。

In Mandarin, “I love you” means “我愛(ài)你” (Wo ai ni), but the way its used in China might be a little different from Western countries, and Chinese media wants to know the reason.

“I love you” 在普通話里表示“我愛(ài)你”(Wo ai ni)，但在中國(guó)這句話用法有些不同于西方國(guó)家，中國(guó)媒體也想知道其中的原因。

The Global Times reports two online videos which show that children tell their parents “I love you” and the videos become popular in China. The first video is filmed by an Anhui TV station. It shows many college students telling their parents “I love you”. There are various3 responses from parents. Such as, “Are you drunk?” asked one parent. The second video is shot by a Shanxi TV station. A father even responded— “I am going to a meeting, so cut the crap.”

《環(huán)球時(shí)報(bào)》報(bào)道，兩個(gè)記錄了孩子對(duì)父母說(shuō)“我愛(ài)你”的視頻，在中國(guó)流傳甚廣。其中一個(gè)視頻是安徽電視臺(tái)拍攝的，它拍下了許多大學(xué)生對(duì)父母說(shuō)“我愛(ài)你”時(shí)的片段，父母的反應(yīng)各式各樣。比如，其中有一位家長(zhǎng)回答“你喝醉了嗎？”另一個(gè)視頻是山西電視臺(tái)拍攝的，視頻中竟然有一位父親這樣回答——“我要開(kāi)會(huì)，廢話少說(shuō)?！?/p>

There are only a few positive responses: “I am so happy you called to say that, it is the happiest thing for me in 2014,” one parent answered.

積極的回答只是極少數(shù)，“我真高興聽(tīng)到你對(duì)我說(shuō)這句話，這是2014年最讓我開(kāi)心的事?！逼渲幸晃患议L(zhǎng)這樣回答。

Why dont Chinese families use those words? It is widely said that Chinese people is influenced by Confucian teaching, or the thought of 20th Century Communism. “The parents responses show that many Chinese are not good at expressing positive4 emotions,” Xia Xueluan, a sociologist from Peking University, told the Global Times. “They are used to teaching children with negative5 language.”

為什么在中國(guó)家庭中人們不習(xí)慣說(shuō)這三個(gè)字？人們普遍認(rèn)為這是受儒家思想或20世紀(jì)共產(chǎn)主義思想的影響。“那些父母的回答反映出許多中國(guó)人都不善于表達(dá)積極情感的事實(shí)，”北京大學(xué)社會(huì)學(xué)家夏學(xué)鑾這樣對(duì)《環(huán)球時(shí)報(bào)》說(shuō)道，“他們習(xí)慣用消極的語(yǔ)言教育孩子?！?/p>

Last year China Daily asked people from some classes if they said ‘I love you to their parents, spouses6, and children. “I have never said ‘I love you to my family, and I dont think I will in the future,” one 56-year-old told the paper. “Saying it aloud is embarrassing7 for me.”

去年《中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)》在向各階層人士的采訪中詢問(wèn)他們是否對(duì)自己的父母、愛(ài)人和孩子說(shuō)過(guò)“我愛(ài)你”?！拔覐牟粚?duì)家人說(shuō)‘我愛(ài)你，我想我以后也不會(huì)說(shuō)?！币粋€(gè)56歲的老先生這樣對(duì)《中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)》說(shuō)，“說(shuō)這樣的話會(huì)讓我感到難為情?！?/p>

Still, that doesnt mean that love cant be expressed. In another article, China Daily spoke to Zhao Mengmeng, she is a 31-year-old woman and she said she had never told her father she loved him face-to-face (“I think it a little odd”). Sometimes actions speak louder than words, however — Zhao gave her father, a single parent, a photo album8 full of photographs of them together on almost her every birthdays her in June 2012. The pictures went popular and have been forwarded thousands of times on Weibo.

但這并不代表中國(guó)人無(wú)法表達(dá)愛(ài)。在另一篇文章中，《中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)》采訪了趙萌萌，今年31歲的她說(shuō)自己從未當(dāng)面對(duì)父親說(shuō)過(guò)“我愛(ài)你”（“我覺(jué)得這有點(diǎn)怪怪的”）。然而，有時(shí)行動(dòng)比語(yǔ)言更有說(shuō)服力——趙萌萌在2012年6月父親生日當(dāng)天送了他一本相冊(cè)，相冊(cè)里記錄的都是每年她生日時(shí)父女倆一起的合影。照片火遍整個(gè)網(wǎng)絡(luò)，在微博上被瘋狂轉(zhuǎn)發(fā)。

“I didnt sleep the night when I knew it,” her father told China Daily after the story got many peoples attention. “I can now remember some of the comment9 under the pictures.”

“當(dāng)我得知這件事后，我徹夜未眠?！痹谶@件事受到很多人的關(guān)注后，她的父親這樣對(duì)《中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)》說(shuō)，“現(xiàn)在我還能記得一些照片下面的評(píng)論?！?/p>